Reps Make You Strong in Love
Welcome to Your Love Breakthrough! Get Real. Love.
In this edition: Reps Make You Strong in Love
Perspective – When Repeating the Same Thing Over and Over is Sanity.
Practical Tactics – Tips for Finding the Kind of Relationship You Want
Get back in the ring to get a ring. You're strong!
Perspective — I don’t think so, Einstein!
"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results" is a quote often erroneously attributed to Einstein. It’s not just erroneously attributed, it’s just erroneous.
When you do physical exercise reps like lifting weights, doing the same thing over and over makes you stronger. When you repeat physical or mental exercises, you change your neural pathways to improve your physical capacity and mindset. Repetitions create results. Your outlook improves as you expect the desired outcome.
In online dating, you might come across profile after profile, communication, date, even relationship—of not-the-One-for-yous.
The psychological effect of that repetition can make you feel disgruntled.
But if you do “love muscle reps”, you harness a potentially difficult endeavor and use it to train yourself to learn love-actions and love-responses in unpleasant circumstances.
After all, when you spend your days with the “One”, you’ll work those love muscles on a regular basis and be grateful that you built up strength on the way.
Case in point: A personal story here… I have had balance issues my whole life. Physical therapists in my childhood said I would never be able to balance on my left foot. My recent physical therapist instructed me to try to stand on my left food every single day, even if I stumbled within a couple of seconds—not to mind if nothing changed. If I kept doing it, eventually my neural pathways would change. He was right. Soon I could balance on my left for 30 seconds, sometimes more than 60 seconds.
It’s the same with how you handle disappointments. You can learn to turn them around when you flex your love muscles and don’t cave in to discouragements.
Practical Tactics — Flexing your love muscles in the online dating realm
Post photos that radiate love in your countenance (You can be flirtatious, sexy and loving/kind all at once.) Post messages that convey positivity and caring.
Catch your knee-jerk reactions when someone of a demographic outside your preference settings slips through the filters, or someone you don’t find comely comes on to you. Turn it around and think kind thoughts toward that person and wish them well. It’s likely going to happen.
If you get ghosted on or stood up or rejected, it’s a chance to dive deep into loving yourself and forgiving another.
And of course, the dating and relating process present endless opportunities to do love-reps. The chances will never die out.
One last thought: if you do find yourself spinning negatively, it’s a chance to love yourself, to reach out to people you know and trust and let them fill your love tank. Fuel makes you stronger and overflows to those around you, even those online.
Want in depth online dating insights? Your Love Breakthrough: Effective Online Dating Strategies is available on Amazon.
What you have you missed? Check out past email messages from Christy Sanborn Grassman.